If translation were rocket science
What if the Japanese-to-English translation industry were the rocket-science industry? What if instead of clients with dubious English skills "incorrecting" your translations on the authority of high-school English textbooks and long-retired sempai, they used hoary old physics textbooks to correct your equations?
I think it might be something like this.
Acme Rocket Industries: Hi, Joe. Have you got a minute?
Joe: Sure.
ARI: I have some questions about your calculations.
Joe: Yes?
ARI: Well, you see how you used this equation over here?
Joe: Yes…
ARI: Well, we have this crusty old high-school physics textbook, and we can't find that equation anywhere in here.
Joe: That's understandable, because I wrote it to serve the desired function. I didn't need to copy it out of a textbook.
ARI: Yes, I understand. But you see, there's this page on rockets in this textbook, with some different equations. And although we don't understand what the equations mean, one of our now-retired in-house rocket scientists may have scrawled an equation very similar to this one in the margins of one of his formulas.
Joe: May have?
ARI: Yes, there are some unidentifiable stains on it — Sandy in marketing thinks it may be mustard — but we're pretty sure that these are the same equations. And so you see, there's a precedent to use this equation within the company, and to use another equation would cause our dear retired rocket scientist to lose face. I'm sure you understand.
Joe: Wait. Just to make sure I understand you, you want to use this equation from a high-school textbook? An equation that you admit you don't even understand?
ARI: Yes.
Joe: Which, by the way, is completely inappropriate and will most likely cause the rocket to explode on the launch pad.
ARI: Um, precedent, you see…
Joe: And you want to completely disregard my expertise, for which you're paying me a hefty sum of money.
ARI: Yes.
Joe: … because you want to avoid causing your retired in-house rocket scientist, who incidentally did not appear capable of distinguishing a differential equation from a grocery list, to lose face.
ARI: Yes, that's about the size of it.
Joe: OK, just make sure my invoice is paid on time, and do not put my name on anything remotely involved with this project.
Later that week…
Newscaster: … yet another failed rocket launch at Acme Rocket Industries. A spokesperson from ARI appeared baffled by the explosion, stating "I don't understand it. We employ strict internal quality control, relying on a great store of in-house expertise. Obviously we need to be stricter in our selection of outside contractors."
Brilliant!
Excellent!!
Actually does sound like some conversations I’ve had 
But we all know J-E Translation isn’t rocket science
[...] thread popped up over at FG lightheartedly introducing this joke. It shows an example of what it’s like to translate Japanese for a JP company: Joe: Wait. [...]
Haha….so true! And the best part is that now ACME have a gaijin approved precedent for future use!!
Oh, too funny. I laughed very hard, great scenario. Did you do this piece of creative writing elsewhere or could this *possibly* be based on a potentially true story (it certainly could, I’ve had many conversations that resemble this). Unfortunately for us, our names are still associated with the work (at least within the company that we did the project for), even if we vetoed a specific part of it. Thanks for the good chuckle.
Correction: I meant to ask if you’d done this piece of creative writing yourself; whether this is a product of your creative mind or based on a true story.
@Judy
Let’s say I was inspired by a translation I did a couple of months ago.
I was working (through an agency) for a well known high-tech company. Throughout the translation, I was hampered by the need to adhere to the terminology in their previous translations, even though most of them were very, very bad.
Last week, the agency told me excitedly that my translation had been given a prominent place on the company’s website. I looked at the first few paragraphs, and had to close the page. It was just too painful to read.